shithub: no_memory

ref: b9fbb17c04e4ccfb2021dac818e514351ca8f646
dir: /troff/0109.ms/

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.LP
\&
.ce
.sp |4.25i
.PP
.ps 12
.CW ░
Finally and at long last knowing himself, SL wandered into the countryside.  He'd sneak out of the hotel
before dawn, while the brand coaches were still asleep, and break for the
woods.  In these parts there were no isolated stands of trees.  Every
branch of the forest connected somehow back to its trunk.  You
followed the leaves to the sky, then followed the veins back down to the ground.
You never escaped the tree.
.PP
.ps 12
Within this semantic forest one typically encountered more trash than on the street.
A catalog of discarded items, some of them immediately
saleable, some useful personally.  Today SL encountered both varieties
of green trash, and immediately he made plans for its
collection and dispersal.

.PP
.ps 12
The creeks were similarly full of litter.  Sometimes SL came upon piles of
unopened MREs.  He knew which shops back in town would be interested in the expired meals.
Caches of crap turned back into cash.
.PP
.ps 12
SL would perch himself on an outcropping alongside the creek and feel the cool
water soaking into his shoes.  Mosquitoes skipped across the
reflecting surface, dodging expertly as he tried to swat them
away.  Mold, everywhere.
.PP
.ps 12
He had no memory of why he'd come here.

.PP
.ps 12
Twenty minutes deeper into the woods (though somehow still within
earshot of rush hour traffic), the trail opened up onto the abandoned
ruins of what once must have been a house.  Like everything else in the
town, it felt familiar.

.PP
.ps 12
On days when it rained the whole town stank of cat piss.  In
reality it had to have been something else because SL had never seen
a cat in West Berlin.  Or maybe it was just that they'd all been hiding from
him.  Whatever the cause, the air, and everything else, was stifling.
.PP
.ps 12
SL couldn't get back to his room quickly enough.  He propelled himself into the shower.

.PP
.ps 12
Breakfast was a cul\-de\-sac.  He steered himself to his table, turned himself around, and steered
himself right back out again.  Another routine sublimated within the blank,
gray miscategorization of his user icon.  This, too, flew in the face of
recovery theory.  The automatic mechanisms he had hoped to finally transcend had been
replaced with labor intensive equivalents\(emthough these, too, were
beyond his willingness to comprehend consciously.  They had him working against himself.
Life imitating
farce, world without end.

.PP
.ps 12
It had all gone quiet enough that he was once again prepared to
wonder about the fate of his friend, whose name he could no longer remember.
.PP
.ps 12
That would complicate a search.